Feudal Pirates: Holiday Feast Special!
by DJ Paynter
Summary: The AxeHeads are once again called back into Feudal Japan, this time not for a battle against powerful demons, but for a celebration of nakama!


DJP: Whoo! Time for Thanksgiving, and you know what that means!

DJM: Turkey!

DJP: Well, yes, but it also means it's time for pointless specials! So get ready for… dun dun dun, the Feudal Pirates Thanksgiving Holiday Special!

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Feudal Pirates: Holiday Feast Special!

Inuyasha continued sniffing around the city, wearing a red baseball cap to cover up his dog ears while he and Kagome were out shopping. "What the hell are we doing in your world anyway Kagome? We're wasting time we could be using to hunt down Naraku!" He shouted as he crouched down, continuing to take in all the smells from the unfamiliar modern city.

Kagome sighed and sweatdropped as she watched the out of place dog demon, who was earning stares from passers-by because of his dog-like position. "We're doing some food shopping for the dinner coming up."

"Food? Can we get some of that ninja food?" Inuyasha's ears perked up as he thought of the instant noodles he loved.

"No…" Kagome sighed as she pulled Inuyasha up to his hind legs as they walked into a convenience store. "There's something very seasonal that people get around this time of year to have a big dinner with friends, they mostly do it in the west but I figured it's appropriate for us too." The schoolgirl smirked and held her head high.

"Oh? And what's that?" Inuyasha already felt himself wandering off to the Ramen noodles section, only to be pulled back quickly by Kagome.

"A turkey."

"What's a turkey?" The dog demon's ears twitched inquisitively.

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Miroku sighed as he put another sutra seal on the shrine they had found, Sango and Kaede were blessing the ground around it while Shippo was making drawings for the different ideas of sutras. They had heard that this shrine helped people cross over from the spirit world, so they hoped that it would also serve their purposes.

"How's this Miroku?" Shippo held up a sutra with a skull on it, with four axes coming out of the sides. "Vassal Dusty showed it to me when she was here." He giggled quietly.

"Hmmm… worth a shot Shippo." Miroku sighed as he slapped the sutra on the shrine as Sango and Kaede finished spreading the purifying salts.

"We're back!" Kagome shouted cheerfully as she and Inuyasha ran towards the shrine. She was holding on oddly shaped bag on top of her already overstuffed backpack.

"Yeah, you guys got the shrine ready yet? Kagome's hell-bent on having those guys here for this." Inuyasha sighed softly.

"Yup! Sure did Inuyasha!" Shippo chuckled as he pointed to his Jolly Roger sutra.

"What's that stupid thing?" Inuyasha stared at the sutra and started to poke at it.

"It's not stupid!" Shippo jumped on Inuyasha's head and bonked him a few times. "I made it and it's what's gonna get those guys to come back here!"

"AH! Get off me ya little runt!" Inuyasha screamed as Shippo jumped down of his head, running around the small shrine a few times as Inuyasha chased him.

"Kagome! Help! Inuyasha's being mean to me!"

"Sit boy!"

Inuyasha yelped as he tripped over his own feet and fell, crashing right through the door to the shrine building.

"Are you alright Inuyasha?" Sango blinked as she looked inside the shrine, but as she looked around, all she saw was dusty relics and darkness.

"Where'd he go…?"

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"I hate feeling like this. I'm so tired of trying to fight this. I'm asleep and all I dream of. Is waking to You! Tell me that You will listen. Your touch is what I'm missing. And the more I hide I realize, I'm slowly losing You!" DJ sang softly as he played softly into his flute, leaning against the rail of _The Tomahawk _and looking up to the afternoon sky.

"Put a sock in it MacLeod!" A voice yelled from inside the galley. "I'm trying to eat here and I don't need you making me nauseous!"

"Bite me Demon!" He shouted back.

"HOLY SHIT!!!" A shriek came from further back in the cabins.

"Crap! That came from the girl's bathroom!" Azu shouted as he climbed down from the crows nest.

"How can you tell?" DJ raised an eyebrow.

"Trust me, I know." The shipwright gave a lecherous smirk.

DJ, Azu, and Devon ran to the girls bathroom as fast as they could and were greeted by a very peculiar sight. Standing there, with the rest of the crew in the doorway, was Kirsty in a towel and what appeared to be a white-haired half-dog, half-human mixture. The dog man was on his stomach, feet curled up by his head and giving him a C- form position which made him look like he had fallen from somewhere.

"What the hell is going on here?!" Devon shouted, his face turning red.

"He just popped out of nowhere!" Kirsty shouted.

"Glad to see you too." Inuyasha grumbled as he sat up, rubbing his head with his legs crossed.

"Who the hell are you?" Axe stared at the dog man and crouched down to the stranger's level.

"Doggy!" Dusty shouted and pushed herself to the front of the crowd, hugging Inuyasha tightly. "Are these real?" She pulled on the dog ears coming out of his head. "Did you eat an Inu Inu no mi too?"

"OW! Why does everyone always do that!?" Inuyasha backed up a few steps. "I'm starting to get hurt guys, you seriously don't remember me?"

"Well, what's your name?" Chizuru suggested.

"Awww man, I knew this trip was a waste of time… I'm Inuyasha." The dog man stood up and tugged on his red kimono.

"Inuyasha? Why does that sound familiar?" Axe scratched his head.

"DJ-kun, what was that story you told us a couple of months back? After we all came out of that weird trance?" Chizuru turned to the musician.

"Oh yeah! That's right." He ran to his room in a flash and came back with a piece of paper that looked very waterlogged, the ink running and barely legible. "This was the only page we could save after the… accident." The parts that could be read looked like a title page to a story, reading: _Inuyasha: A Feudal Fairytale_.

"Oh yeah! That story!" Niri smirked. "So this guy came out of your writings?"

"I knew you stole it from somewhere else, you're not that creative." Devon hmphed and crossed his arms as Austin nodded in agreement.

"I'm so confused." Azu banged his head against the wall lightly. "What the hell are you guys talking about?"

"It was before you joined the crew." Niri explained.

"Anyway, Kagome wanted me to come get you guys to come to some dumb holiday feast, she got a turkey and everything and said you guys were the closest thing to family we had around here." He looked around the bathroom for a moment. "You guys live here? What a dump…"

"HEY!" Azu shouted, being held back by Niri from attacking the dog man.

"MEAT!!!" Dusty and Axe exclaimed upon hearing about the food. "WE'RE SO GOING!"

"If we're lucky, whatever we seem to have forgotten will be remembered when we get there." Chizuru sighed. "So how do we get there?"

As if in answer to her question, a loud crash was heard outside the door, followed by a yelp and a girl in a green skirt walking by, holding her hip and dusting off her clothes. "Hey there guys…" She chuckled nervously.

"Kagome, what're you doing here?" Inuyasha crossed his arms and scoffed.

"You needed to get back somehow, right? I guess it's like the Bone-eater's Well, you and I are the only ones from our world who can get through. If we're lucky, these guys will be able to as well, since they travel from different worlds already." The girl said in a manner-of-fact tone.

"Fine, so how do we get there already!?" Devon growled, a small sound of anger in his voice.

"Let's see, since the seal is active, the door I came through should be an okay way." Kagome opened one of the cabin doors, which gave off an odd glow as she and Inuyasha stepped inside and disappeared.

"Let's see… glowing doors with strangers… or safe and stable ship?" Niri mumbled to herself.

"Who cares!? They have meat!" Dusty shouted and pushed Niri into the door, everyone else following close behind.

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Miroku watched as one by one, Kagome, Inuyasha, Niri, and then the rest of the Axe-Heads tumbled through the door to the shrine. "Welcome." He blinked, wide-eyed at the strange sight.

"Whoot! I remember now!" Dusty exclaimed as she stood up and brushed herself off.

"Yeah, me too." Axe mumbled.

"Wonder what made us forget." Herman sighed as he helped Austin up.

"I'm still confused as hell." Azu sighed as Pingu bounced on his head.

"We'll explain everything later." DJ chuckled as he stood up, rushing to Sango. "Sango-chwaan! Did you miss me?" He grinned broadly, an expression of love on his face, earning him a soft bonk on the head from both Miroku and Dusty.

"Oh, hello there Niri." Miroku grinned, reaching a hand around to her back.

"Hi Miroku." Niri smiled overly sweetly, grabbing Miroku's wrist firmly and pulling it in front of him, keeping a firm grip on it. "Now that I remember you, I'm sure you've changed and… won't… try… anything…" She gritted her teeth

A loud snap sent shivers up Shippo's spine. "Eww! Who's cracking their knuckles?"

"That was my wrist…" Miroku sobbed as the marksman let go of his hand.

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After everyone had finished catching up and recovered from their beatings, they decided to head out to where the feast would take place, the shrine of Miroku's old master, Monk Mushin. "So what's this Mushin guy like?" Azu asked. "I bet since he's a monk he's gonna be all uptight and religious."

"Not really…" Inuyasha, Kagome, Shippo, and Sango muttered together.

"What I'm getting at is, will he let me bring my saki into the temple?" The drunken shipwright smirked.

"No doubt about it, but I would guard that jug carefully if I were you, Master Mushin loves his saki." Miroku chuckled.

"So if this is a feast for family, why don't you invite your brother Inuyasha?" Niri raised her eyebrow to the dog demon.

"Master Inuyasha and Lord Sesshomaru… don't get along too well." Came a small voice from Kirsty, followed by what sounded like a gulping sound.

SLAP!

"Hey, whatdya know? A talking flea." Kirsty looked down at the flattened creature in her hand.

"Myoga, what is it with you? You always have to be pigging out on someone's blood." Inuyasha looked to the flea with one eye closed.

"Oh yeah, I remember you, the flea who always ran away whenever things got tough." Axe smirked.

"I was not running away! I was simply… gathering more information on different sources to help Master Inuyasha."

Kagome sighed as she listened to the boy argue. "We're going to have to get this turkey cooking, I'm not sure how long it'll take on Mushin's wood stove."

"I'd be happy to help Kagome." Herman smirked as he looked to the schoolgirl. "I'm sure we can cook it fast and still make it taste good."

"Really!? Thanks Herman!"

Once the group of pirates and demon hunters made their way to the front of the shrine, they were greeted by a man with a mustache in a purple robe, and very pink cheeks, like he had been drinking all his life. "Welcome, you must be the pirates Miroku told me about." He gave a soft grin under his facial hair.

"Oh no! I forgot!" Kagome put her hands to her face, "We have the turkey, but we don't have anything else! And it's too late to go get anything from my world now."

"It's not like our world is devoid of food ya know." Inuyasha grunted.

"Wow, devoid, big word, did ya hurt yourself?" Devon cracked.

"Shut up!"

"Don't worry, I'll go see if I can round up some fruit or something with Austin." Devon sighed and turned around. "The whole holiday scene isn't really my style anyway."

"Nah, better let me do it demon, I can get more fruit than you." DJ smirked.

"Wanna bet!?"

"Hell yeah!"

"They're at it again…" Niri, Kirsty, Chizuru and Dusty sweatdropped.

"Alright, we'll spilt up tasks." Niri clapped her hands. "DJ and Dev, you two gather fruit for a side. Herman, you and Kagome are on cooking duty. Dusty, you're on entertainment. Azu, you're on refreshments with Mushin. Sango, Miroku, Austin, Chizuru, and Kirsty, you're on cleaning. And finally, me, Axe, Inuyasha, Shippo and Pingu will handle decorations."

"Alright, whoever brings back the best fruit wins." DJ and Devon shook hands and then sped off into the forest.

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Pingu and Shippo rolled around in the grass courtyard playing as Niri and Axe started putting up colorful papers and other decorations for the celebration. "Wonder what this whole feast thing is gonna be like." Niri sighed.

"Who knows? Never been to one of these before." Axe fumbled, trying to fold a paper person. "But it is a celebration for family, and you're basically one of the longest-standing family members I can remember." He chuckled softly, finally folding up his paper into an odd, yet nice-looking swan shape. "So the way I see it, spending it with nakama in this world and the next is the best possible way to spend this holiday."

"Aww, how uncharacteristically reflective of you." Niri joked as she already had ten times as many swan shapes done as Axe.

"I have my moments…" Axe laughed as he stood up and began to walk out of the room.

"Where are you going?"

"Make room for the feast." Axe chuckled and patted his stomach. "I'll be back in about twenty minutes. By the way… sorry." The pirate captain smirked and walked away.

"For w-….. EWW! AXE!!!" Niri waved her hand in front of her face to try and breathe cleaner air.

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"WIND TUNNEL!"

Chizuru, Kirsty, and Austin all watched as Miroku's wind tunnel sucked up all the small pieces of trash and dirt from the temple, cleaning the whole place in a matter of seconds.

"Every woman's dream, the ultimate vacuum cleaner." Kagome chuckled before walking back into the kitchen to help Herman.

"What's a vacuum cleaner?" Kirsty whispered to Chizuru.

"No clue…" The navigator shrugged as Austin shook his head silently.

"Hiraikotsu!" Sango yelled as she swung her giant boomerang against the temple rugs, beating the dust out of them.

"How heavy is that thing Sango?" Kirsty blinked.

"Pretty heavy." Sango smirked as Austin eyed her weapon, letting go of it to show them the weight and watched as the boy toppled over under the heavy weapon. "I train every day to be able to wield it like I do."

"Wow, you must really train hard then." Kirsty lifted up the weapon with a grunt, but seemingly doing so with little problem with her advanced strength. "Can I try beating a few rugs?"

"Go ahead." The demon slayer smirked and watched as Kirsty hit the rug with the large weapon many times, grunting softly as she did and seeming to get tired out easily. "Try the yell when you do it, it releases air from your lungs and makes it easier to swing." She instructed in an older sisterly tone.

"Hiraikotsu!" Kirsty smacked the boomerang against the rug hard, releasing a cloud of dust. "Awesome! Hiraikotsu! Hiraikotsu! Hiraikotsu!!!" The doctor smacked the rug again and again, releasing larger clouds of dust before falling over coughing. "Ehehehe… guess I overdid it…" She chuckled nervously.

"Ya think?" Chizuru sighed as she sensed Miroku's lecherous thoughts and pointed one of her daggers towards his throat before his hand could reach her bottom. "Don't try it."

Miroku sighed in defeat. "I am just having no luck today…"

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DJ grinned as he chopped down fruit after fruit of their stems. "Heeheee, that bet was whoever can get the most fruit wins, never bet against a speedy swordsman in a quality race Demon." He looked to his enormous pile of fruit.

"SPEED-SPEED CUTTER!" The musician dissappeared for a moment, only to reappear, his sabre unsheathed and his eyes closed before dozens of fruits fell onto the ground behind him. "I'm so going to win…" he chuckled.

-in another part of the forest-

Devon sighed, holding Geri and Freki out in front of him. "Alright, the challenge was the one would could bring back the biggest fruit wins, so the better swordsman would obviously win that, just gotta find a huge-ass fruit."

The first mate continued looking around the forest, humming a sad song to himself as he walked. "No way am I going to lose to that love-poet." He smirked softly. He continued humming until a shadow came over him, but not the shadow of the setting sun.

As the nittoryu swordsman looked up, he saw the largest fruit he had ever seen, it was so big that it even bent the fairly large tree it was so that it was just barely over his head. "Perfect… TANKETETSU!" He sliced through the stem and let the fruit fall to the ground with a loud thud. "I'm so going to win…"

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"Man, you're alright Mushin!" Azu clapped the master monk on the back and gave a drunk laugh, both now very pink in the cheeks.

"Thanks –hic- kid, you t-hic-ooo…" Mushin laughed as well, nearly falling over from being woozy.

"You remind me of Master Biiru." Azu smirked and almost fell back himself. "He taught me every sin I know." He laughed loudly.

"Same for me and Miroku." Mushin also laughed a little.

"Oh, Master Mushin." Kagome smiled sweetly as she came out of the kitchen. "The sun's starting to set, do you want anything before dinner? It's the least we can do for you letting us stay here."

"I think I'd like… some saki…" Mushin hiccuped and took another swig out the giant jug he and Azu shared.

"You're already drinking saki!" Kagome shouted.

"Oh?" Mushin looked at the jug, as if seeing it for the first time. "So I am…" He hiccuped again before he and Azu passed out on their backs.

"Oh brother…" Kagome sweatdropped.

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Kagome walked back into the kitchen, where Herman was cooking the turkey in Mushin's wood stove. "It's almost done." The lobster merman looked up as the bird continued to cook.

"Great! Thanks for all your help Herman." Kagome smiled sweetly.

"No problem, I love to help out." Herman smiled before turning around his stalks as he heard a rustling sound behind him. He didn't have to look to know what it was though. "Dusty, dinner will be shortly, and don't you have an act to be working on?"

"I can work on an empty stomach!" The fox girl whined as her ears turned down.

"Well then see if DJ or Devon are back with their fruit stash, maybe you can con DJ out of some fruit early."

"Great idea!" Dusty smirked and ran outside. "DJ-kuuuun!"

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"How the hell…"

"I don't know man…"

"How did he even…"

"I don't know!"

DJ, Devon, and Dusty all stood in front of the largest fruit pile they had ever seen, with fruit even bigger than Devon's and even more fruit than DJ's pile. On top of the pile, was a very happy penguin, grinning from flipper to flipper.

"HOW THE HELL DID PINGU WIN OUR BET!?" Both swordsmen exclaimed.

"AWWW! Great job Pingu-kun!" Dusty picked up the bird and hugged him tightly, stealing some of the fruit from the pile while he was in her lock.

"Great… cheated out of Dusty-chan's affections by a bird…" DJ hmphed.

"Years of training…. Beaten by a penguin." Devon stared wide-eyed at Pingu's huge pile.

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"Dinner's served!" Kagome and Herman shouted together as they placed the magnificently cooked and spiced turkey on the temple's short dining room table. One each side of the table were fruits from Pingu's, DJ's, and even pieces of Devon's fruits.

"MEAT!!!" Dusty, Axe, and Inuyasha dived into the large turkey like they hadn't seen food in years.

Kagome's eye twitched. "Hours of work… gone…" She gasped as Herman laughed.

"You have to get used to that when cooking for pirates, it's rarely appreciated for more than a few minutes." He sat down and took what was left of the turkey and passed it out to those who hadn't gotten any, taking a bit of Pingu's fruit for himself.

"How are you guys even still standing after drinking that much?" Kirsty looked to Azu and Mushin, whose faces with both as red as cherries.

"It takes a whoooole lot to –hic- bring us –hic- down." Azu laughed and swayed from side to side, leaning on Mushin for support.

"Hey! Where'd my turkey go?" Dusty shouted as the remainder of the meat she hadn't eaten on contact was now gone off her plate.

"Good boy Pingu-kun!" Niri patted the penguin on the head as he placed the stolen meat on hers and his own plates.

"Forget it Kit," Axe smirked and patted her on the back. "Wasn't there an act you had planned for after dinner?"

"Yeah! Act time!" Shippo pounded his fists on the table while Austin nodded quietly for the act.

"Alright! I got one! DJ-kun, I'm gonna need music for this one!" She stood up in front of the group.

"Hai Dusty-chan!" DJ was up in front of the table before anyone could blink. "Anyone got a guitar?"

"I think I have someone around here somewhere." Mushin stood up drunkenly and rummaged through some junk before finding a simple guitar. "Here ya go kid." He tossed DJ the instrument.

"What should I play Dusty-chan?" He sat down and strummed the strings quietly.

"I dunno, something festive!"

"Alright." He smirked and started humming, then singing. "Love to eat turkey. 'Cause it's good. Love to eat turkey. Like a good boy should. 'Cause it's turkey to eat. So g-" He was cut off by a hit to the head by Dusty.

"Not that song!"

"Sorry Dusty-chan." DJ chuckled and started playing a festive and upbeat instrumental song.

Dusty began a very elaborate and elegant dance, humming along to the song as she went.

"Get ready… Fox Fire!" Dusty grinned as everyone at the table gasped when sparks emitted from her fingertips, a different color of illusionary flames on each finger. As she continued spinning, each color filled the air to make a delightful rainbow of colors. She struck a pose and the flames exploded with a loud crack, making popping sounds as each when went out, sending small lights out to the corners of the room.

"Now, time for the finisher! Dessert act!" She extended her hands and a cloud of smoke filled the room. A small sound of air rushing by came as DJ ran past everybody, putting a piece of pie made from the fruit the boys had gathered on everyone's plate. Once the smoke cleared, Dusty took her bows with thunderous applause from everyone in the room. "Thank you, thank you! I'm here till nine!"

"When did you guys put this together?" Kirsty looked at the fruit pie and then to DJ and Herman.

"We had some extra time while everyone was getting ready." Herman smirked. "You'd be surprised how fast a pie can be put together with a speed-speed powered assistant."

"That's not my last surprise." DJ smirked and pulled something out from behind his back. He revealed a small crown of flowers, which he placed gently on Dusty's head. "After all, this is the time to show the people we care about that we appreciate them, right?" He smirked and nodded to Inuyasha and Miroku, who pulled out similar crowns for both Kagome and Sango respectively.

"AWWW! Thank you DJ-kun!" Dusty wrapped her arms around the musician in a tight hug, earning a delighted squee from the pirate.

"Inuyasha…" Kagome blushed and looked to the dog demon, who looked away quickly.

"Feh, whatever."

"Thank you Inuyasha." She smiled and gave him a small kiss on the cheek.

"EEK!" Came the sound of Miroku ruining a moment, followed by the all too familiar slapping sound, with the monk now having a red palm mark on his face as Sango giggled lightly. "I guess it wouldn't be a day if you didn't do that, thank you Miroku." She hugged the lecherous monk softly, keeping his hands safely away from her bottom.

DJ nudged Devon softly. "Yo, Demon, that isn't the last crown I made." He smirked and pointed to under the swordsman's chair, where there was a small crown labeled to Kirsty. "Give it to her, you know you want to."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Devon blushed furiously and looked away.

"Give the crown to Kirsty, chance are she won't remember it when we get back to out world anyway with how the memories are between worlds."

"How do I know you're not just leading me on?" The first mate sighed.

"Would I do that to you?"

"Yes"

"Well I'm not." He stuck out his tongue and nudged the blonde swordsman and doctor together.

Devon blinked and blushed as he was now forced to talk to Kirsty. _Damnit, baka love-poet…_ "Ummm… here…" He could barely manage to give the crown to her before turning beet red.

"Devon…" Kirsty blushed almost as red but smiled and gave him a light hug. "Thank you." She smirked.

"Look at those fools." Axe chuckled as he watched the romantic displays. "How silly."

"Yeah, the crown thing is why too sappy." Niri laughed softly.

"Mhm, but here, I finally made one of those swan things right, I want you to have it… you know, as friends." The captain smirked and handed her a perfectly folded and beautiful paper swan.

"Thanks Axe." Niri smirked and punched him in the shoulder. 'You're always a big softie on the inside. Just don't get any ideas, I know you." She stuck her tongue out as they both laughed.

Myoga smiled and shook his head as he nibbled on some of the leftover scraps of turkey. "Always an odd time with these two groups." He watched as Pingu stood on the table and raised a flipper, ready to swat the flea. "No, No Pingu! NOOOOOO!"

SMACK!

"HONK!" (Translation: Happy Turkey day/Thanksgiving everyone!)

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DJP: Wow, that was longer than I thought,please review and hope everyone enjoys! Have a happy Thanksgiving and remember to appreciate all those we call nakama both blood related and otherwise!

Kagome: See ya soon!


End file.
